Being in the Guinness World Record book is on a majority of Bucket Lists, mine included. But, I never knew what I would do to get there; knit the longest scarf, shove 1000 straws in my mouth or charm a dozen snakes? A visit to the Guinness World Record Museum in San Antonio, Texas would surely help me narrow it down.

Could I possibly fit 161 clothes pins to my face to beat Garry Turners record of 160?

My first thought is that I could easily fill my face with clothes pins, but then I remembered that I have a really small head. Besides, I was fearful that the pins would leave scars. This is not an option.
Clothes Pins Guinness World Record

I ever so briefly contemplated an attempt at eating the most cockroaches (currently, the record is 36).

But, cockroaches truly are the creatures that have nine lives and I didn’t want to take any chances of their survival in my belly. Next.

Even though I had previously wrapped a snake around my neck, the only way I will be sticking a rattlesnake in my mouth is when it is chopped up in a rattlesnake stew.
Most cockroaches eatenMost rattlesnacks held in mouth

There were two Guinness World Records I could never hold, being the heaviest man or the tiniest woman.
Heaviest Man Annette White at Guinness World Record Museum

I was starting to get discouraged when I spotted a display to build your own house of cards.

The Guinness World Record for the most stories in a house of cards is 131.

My heart jumped, I used to make card houses as a child on a daily basis and I am really good at Jenga, that has to count for something. I spent a frustrating half an hour attempting to break a world record. Turns out that these loaner cards were too slippery, they were not the standard Bicycle brand I am used to and I was being pressured by the five year old standing behind me. Or maybe, I’m just not as good at this as I remember.
House of CardsHouse of Cards

Looks like I am going to have to give drinking ketchup at shot instead.
Tomato Ketchup Drinker

What Guinness World Record would you like to beat?

Disclosure: This attraction was sponsored by the San Antonio Convention & Visitors Bureau, but all the words I write come straight from my, sometimes distorted, mind. Just as it should be.